Jokes

stayer

Before the marriage

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in bed. She
puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him.

She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of
him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches
as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee.

"What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are
you down here at this time of night?"

The husband looks up from his coffee, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we
were dating, and you were only 16?" he asks solemnly.

"Yes I do" she replies
The husband pauses; the words were not coming easily. "Do you remember when
your father caught us in the
back seat of my car making love?"

"Yes, I remember" said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continued.. "Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my
face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I'll send you to jail for
20 years?"

"I remember that too" she replied softly. He wiped another tear from his
cheek and said, "I would have been released today" . . .
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stayer

Organic Food

The other day, it was my turn to prepare dinner, so I asked my wife to go over to the local market and buy some organic vegetables.

She came back rather upset. When I asked her what was wrong, she said, "I don't think I like that produce guy. I went and looked around for your organic vegetables and I couldn't find any. So I asked him where the organic vegetables were."

"He didn't know what I was talking about, so I said, 'These vegetables are for my husband. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?'"

"And he said, 'No, ma'am. You'll have to do that yourself.'"
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